Dear Fr. Leo,
I am in the process of moving and realizing between my husband and myself we have many bibles. I want to dispose of them properly, but I am not sure how to go about that. Please educate me on the proper disposal of them. – C
Dear C,
If possible, it is best to give old Bibles away. I suggest donating them to a church or school or a religious Thrift Store. That way, it makes them available to others at reasonable price and the proceeds go a good cause. The same is true for sacramentals and other blessed objects such as crucifixes, rosaries, and holy cards, etc. If a Bible or sacramental is in such a deteriorated condition that it cannot be given away, it is proper to bury or burn it completely. For rosaries and whatnot, you may want to salvage the crucifix and the medallion and give it to someone who makes rosaries so that they can be recycled. The same is true for the corpus and sign on a wooden crucifix.
Many prayers during the move. It is always a bit exciting, but very stressful as well. Here is a suggestion for when you get to your destination and start to unpack. Go out to a thrift store and get yourself a small tabletop Christmas tree. Decorate it up. Next, stack all your boxes in the living room or garage or wherever. Then put the tree in the middle and start playing Christmas music. Wine is optional. This changes the whole dynamic of unpacking. Suddenly, you find yourself saying, “Ooooh look at this! Bathroom towels! Just what we needed!” It also helps one remember that everything we have is ultimately a gift from God and from others.
Dear Fr. Leo:
My husband and I are having our 25th wedding anniversary soon. We wanted to renew our wedding vows, but the priest said that we don’t do that in the Catholic Church. So how do we celebrate our twenty-five years of marriage? – F
Dear F,
First of all, let me thank and congratulate you both for your faithful witness in the vocation of Holy Matrimony. The world has changed. Sadly, your steadfast fidelity to Christ and to each other is not well understood in the present day. It needs to be celebrated from the rooftops. We have a great way of doing that in the Church, but it does not involve renewing your vows. Here’s why.
Because the Church holds married life is such high regard, it’s important to remember what happens when a man and a woman profess their vows according to the laws of the Church in the sight of God, each other, and the gathered community. In doing so, they are making a total gift of themselves, body and soul, without reservation and without condition. This exchange of consent is what creates the marriage. To do so, you have to know yourself inside out and backwards – you can’t give yourself away if you are not your own person. Also, you have to know the one you are giving yourself to -one should never give oneself away without profound and prayerful discernment. Finally, you have the know the nature of the relationship into which you are both entering, namely a permanent, indissoluble union that is life-giving in so many ways.
As the saying goes, “The wedding is a day. The marriage is a lifetime.” Recognizing this, marital consent is given only once at the exchange of vows. This is true for Catholics and non-Catholics alike. Unlike a Netflix subscription, or temporary religious vows, your marriage vows do not expire. Thus, it is unnecessary to renew them. The Church presumes the couple meant what they said and will continue to grow into those vows as life goes on.
So how do we celebrate such a profound vocation? Ask your priest or deacon for the Blessing of a Married Couple found in the Book of Blessings. It is very lovely and involves the reading of scripture, the blessing of your rings, some intercessions, and several options of prayers for blessing of the couple. In our parish, we like to do this during Sunday Mass. That way everyone can join in the blessing and celebrate the couple.
We do this because a good marriage does not just benefit the couple and their family. Its faithfulness and fruitfulness radiate out to include all the rest of us. The Irish, being a great and noble race of people, have a wonderful saying, “May the love of God warm your heart like a great fire so that a friend may come and warm himself there.” A good marriage does the same thing.
Thank you so much for being married! May God bless you in your next twenty-five years.